Tuesday, March 13, 2007

there's just some things we must live without

By its very nature, there's gonna be some sacrifices in every war. Sometimes you gotta figure out if you want to lose a battle and win the war, or win a battle and lose the war. I chose to win one battle, but I lost so much more. But I know there's no use crying over spilt milk because there are some things that I simply cannot change. I am not large enough (or significant enough, or charismatic enough, or ______ enough) to change the world. I think it's hard, too, to change something. So like the coward I was, and like the coward I still am, I chose to raise the white flag and quietly fade away without telling many people.

Sometimes in the quiet of the night, those moments before you fall asleep, you think of what was, and what could have been. Then you wonder why it came to this. And right before your eyes close and you drift off into blessed sleep, you see the answer: It's all like this because you chose it.

This afternoon this unknown number SMSed me, "Dear [my name], have you taken XXX module in NUS before?" My first thought was, hmm, could this be one of those online people whom I've met but deleted the number already? And of course, I replied. I mean, this stranger used my name! Well, to cut a long story short, this person realised that he/she got the wrong person. There's another girl with the same name as me in NUS, you see, and he thought I was that one he was looking for. How do I know the unknown person is a guy? Cos when I tried to call the number, the person didn't pick up. So Piggy Fren missed called him, and he called back, so I know it's a guy.

And why the heck would I want to call this stranger? Because this guy suddenly said he's a teacher and asked me how was my practicum school. So you'd either get freaked out, or really suspicious, right? Like, is one of my friends playing a prank on me? So well, this strange person did not pick up my call, and also refused to tell me his name, but just said that as a teacher he has ways and means of finding people. So I guess some idiot told him there's someone by my name in NIE and then gave him my number. If I find that idiot I'm going to skin him/her alive.

I am NOT that girl from ACJC. Get this clear!!! If you're looking for this girl from NUS, and from Sheares Hall, YOU'VE COME TO THE WRONG PLACE. GO LOOK FOR HER ON MOBLOG.

Sigh. I really hate it when people mistake me for her, because like some other people said, we're completely different people, and she's prettier.

1 comment:

boonleong said...

Hey I know the other Estee Teo! Haha, when she added me on facebook at first I thought she was you!

(But there will always be one and only one kexinst!)